Gum Geek Gets Moment of Glory

Sorry, I like my alliteration. Anyway, I was made disproportionately excited by the quickfire challenge on the latest Top Chef: Just Desserts because it involved Extra Dessert Delights.

Take a peak in my purse and you'll find a Ziploc full of sugar-free gum. I love the stuff. I chew it after practically every meal. I'm partially convinced this is the reason I got good remarks from my dentist at my last check-up, because my daily brushing and flossing didn't change. I have a snack bag of them because I never know what flavor I'm going to want. In my arsenal are all of the Dessert Delight flavors, so when the pastry chefs were challenged to create a tiny dessert to inspire a new edition to the line, I was kind of stoked.

I tried to jot down each entrant quickly, and here are my thoughts:

• Pina Colada: Two chefs did this. Sorry, guys, but Orbit already makes that one, so I'm not interested in a duplicate.
• Lemon Pancakes with Strawberries: They already have Strawberry Shortcake, so this bored me. It ended up winning, but it 'inspired' Lemon Square as the possible new flavor, so I'm okay with that.
• Dulce de Leche: Yes! I would love a caramel gum. Extra needs to make this happen.
• Oatmeal Raisin Cookie: I like that this was a recognizable, iconic dessert, but it's not one I'd be rushing to chew. I feel like Apple Pie already covers the creamy cinnamon category.
• Banana Latte: So I know it would be weird to chew coffee gum, especially since my morning gum is usually to get the coffee taste out, but it did sound kind of good to me. I think it could be done right. Also, banana is a good flavor. Which I guess is why Bananas Foster was one of the options Extra has going up against the challenge winner.
• Raspberry Panna Cotta with Linzer Crust: Um, what? Ah, yes, that beloved dessert recognized around dinner tables everywhere. Failure to 'get' the challenge in my view. But they mentioned a gingerbread flavor, which would be a great holiday edition gum.
• Passion Fruit Gelee with Coconut Tapioca: Yet again we have something which, while a dessert, isn't a standard. Blah.
• Chocolate Cream Cookie with Orange Cheesecake: I'm confused. Is this an orange-flavored Oreo, basically? No. Cheesecake, maybe that would be interesting. Oreo might be interesting, but tough to pull off. And having to call it something non-branded is just silly-sounding.
• Black Forest Cake: I'm totally on board with this one. It's a classic dessert that sounds good and doesn't overlap with the current catalogue of available flavors.

The third option you could vote for was Root Beer Float. I'm good with that too. It's a hard candy, so they should be able to recreate that flavor pretty well. It makes me want them to come up with a soda line of flavors, because Dr. Pepper, Mountain Dew, and Coke all sound good to me now.

Also, I have one more suggestion not covered in any of these instances: Cherry Pie. Come on, it's the All-American classic! It doesn't cover the same ground as Apple Pie, and I would think cherry is within their range to make chewable.

And so ends the disturbing glimpse into how much I love gum. Good night!